Post-partum

It's now 28 days since I was pregnant and here are a few physiological changes I've noticed.

The good news is, breathing is so much easier now that I don't have the extra baggage competing for space with the rest of my organs. This means that I can now go back to sleeping on my back without feeling like I have a boulder on top of me. Also my bladder seems to have regained its normal capacity and then some. It's like a bottomless pit, pretty much like my daughter's stomach. I'm amazed at how much fluid I can drink without having to go to the loo.

On the negative side, my looks have taken a complete nosedive and I don't mean from the time before I got pregnant.

The past few weeks in confinement have moulded me into the perfect personification of "Aunty" with shaggy, dishevelled hair, a double chin and upper arms that wave in the wind. My derrierre is even bigger now than when pregnant. I'm serious! Pants that I was able to wear right up till delivery are now bursting below the midsection onwards. I fear I may never again wear anything without elastic waistbands, never mind my size 27 levi's.

I also have a belly button the size of a grapefruit and stretch marks that make my tummy look like something out of a geography textbook. I dunno... maybe it's the lack of sunshine or polluted air or something and the moment I can step outdoors, the fat will miraculously melt away. There's hope yet... NOT!!

The only thing that has increased in size that I don't quite mind are (surprise, surprise!), my mammary glands. But with the extra weight and the constant feeding and not to mention that nursing bras do not exactly have the best support, gravity has become my boobs' biggest enemy. Oh well, I am a cow, for now anyway!

More pix of my princess

Motherhood 101

It's been 3 weeks & 4 days since I became a mummy. How do I feel? Overwhelmed, but extremely satisfied at the same time. I dunno... words simply do not suffice.

Nat is indeed a treasure (from God, no less) and I love her with every fibre of my being. It's true what they say that you'll never completely fathom the depths of your own mother's love until you become one yourself. That's why in the first few days of her existence I found myself shedding tears both out of joy of having given birth to something so beautiful and also out of understanding and gratitude for the love my mum has shown me and Val all these years.

I can also see hubby's adoration growing for her by the day from the amount of photos he has taken of her. Imagine a grown man cooing “She looks so cute! I wanna dress her up like a bunny!”. Mummy's getting a little jealous 'coz before I had to actually ask him to take pictures of me when we're on holiday and now he's snapping away like crazy even if she's just lying there doing nothing!

The confinement experience has not been too bad thus far. Barring grimy hair and an overdose of sesame oil, I've managed to comfortably stick to most of the dos and avoid the don'ts. (Oh, alright! I do admit to washing my hands with water straight out of the cold water tap sometimes). However, I've not really felt the urge to go outdoors nor crave for hawker food (or any food without the requisite lashings of sesame oil, ginger & rice wine for that matter) for the past few weeks. But with Christmas just around the corner, I did feel the tiniest itch yesterday to just drive to 1U and get started on my yuletide shopping. After all, hubby's been saying we should get a Christmas tree this year and I thought I'd better strike while the iron is hot before he changes his mind.

Having said that, my experience with the confinement nanny was a different thing altogether. The day before I left the hospital, my original confinement nanny called to say she had been taken ill & couldn't do the job, at least till she recovered. Panic-stricken, I called Elaine, An Pheng's wonderful confinement nanny, for help and sure enough, she came through with a replacement.

Ying Jie looked and sounded the part but after a few days, it was obvious that she was more than a tad lazy and exploiting our inexperience as first-time parents. For starters, she didn't want to use cloth diapers nor handwash Nat's clothes and kept insisting on nighttime formula-feeding. Her insinuations that I had hardly any milk to give and how the other babies she had looked after were all so chubby really irritated the shit out of me since I was trying so hard to exclusively breastfeed. If my baby's going to be fat, it will be from the calories of my own milk and nothing else!

She also wasn't taking good care of me nor was she very hygienic when it came to cleaning Nat. Not only that but every time she carried her, it looked like she was manhandling a pig about to be butchered. Heck, she even fibbed about her workdays, telling me she works only 28 days when I later found out that Elaine had told her it was strictly 29 days or no deal. It was so not worth all the good money we were paying!

In the end, things worked out wonderfully when she developed a sore throat and later, a cold, and left after a week. Hurrah! We decided we'd had enough of confinement nannies for the timebeing. Thank God I managed to borrow Su, my dad's Indon maid to help immediately after Ying Jie's departure. She's no Aunty Parvathy but at least she's able to cook and for now appears to love caring for Nat. No complaints about waking up in the middle of the night either.

As for feeding, I'm proud to say that apart from the first 2-3 nights when Ying Jie insisted on feeding formula, I've been able to exclusively breastfeed and intend to do so for at least 6 months. My inspiration stems from those friends who successfully pulled it off, namely Wai Kuan, An Pheng, Flora and Yvonne. Hats off to all of you ladies! Of course I wasn't one of those who had ample supply right from the start so it was easier said than done in the beginning. Desperate to continue, sore nipples or not, I tried every breastmilk-supply enhancing suggestion in the book: turmeric juice, baby shark, papaya soup, fenugreek, milkmaid tea, groundnut/blackbean soup, you name it, I've tried it. My mummy friends kept telling me, just let the baby suckle and the milk will come. True enough, it did!

Now that my confinement period is almost over, I'm bracing myself for the next step... going back to work and the dread that comes with it. I so do not want to be separated from my baby!!! Wish I could be a full-time mum but unfortunately, we are far from being able to afford that luxury. Ah well, at least my consolation is that I can bring my daughter in to work if I want and my boss will probably dote on her too but how I'll get any work done is anyone's guess.

So am I ready for motherhood? You bet!

History of Chinese Full Moon Custom

Full moon or full month celebrations are celebrated by Chinese families whose baby reaches 1 month after birth. On the baby's full month, some families host a dinner to entertain friends and relatives. Red hard-boiled eggs will be distributed too.

An odd number of eggs will be distributed if it is a boy and even number of eggs if it is a girl. Friends and relatives usually give a red packet in return. They may also give presents like baby food, articles for daily use or jewellery.

The Chinese also practise the custom of shaving off the baby's hair on its full month. The baby's hair is wrapped up in a red cloth and sewn to the baby's pillow. It is believed that by doing this, the baby would not be timid or easily frightened.

Symbolic meaning of red eggs:-

• The egg symbolises a new journey in life
• Red symbolises celebration and good luck
• The oval shape symbolises harmony and unity
  

Introducing Natalie Toh Tik Chu

Born 21 November 2006. Weighing 2.885kg (6.3lb).

Diary of An Anxious Mum-to-be

1.30pm. Admitted into DSH. Paid RM2500 deposit. Bed 225, near entrance. Changed to 226 (next to window) when found out previous patient was already discharged.

2pm. Went home. Had ice cream. Sterilised breast pump & some bottles, just in case.

3.30pm. Put baby's clothes into drawers & other sundries into under-cot storage.

5pm. Packed bags properly.

5.30pm. Called May Ann only to find that she has left for Hong Kong. Chatted with Aunty.

6.15pm. Showered, washed & blowdried hair.

6.45pm. Dinner at home with mum & uncle, Val & Yu Lin and Keon & Khai Veun.

7.15pm. Keat & Teon drop by on way to friend's wedding. Start watching Frasier on DVD.

8pm. Siau Yen calls.

8.15pm. Cheryl comes by to go to dinner with Teon & Keat.

9.30pm. Yee Peng calls Khim's phone.

9.45pm. Dad calls to ask "Anything?". I say "Nothing".

10pm. Back at DSH. No one sharing room with me. Hooray or yikes? Staff nurse Lee checked ECG. No contractions yet.

10.30pm. Staff nurse Siti checked for dilation. Zero.

11pm. Hubby, mum & uncle left. Watched some of P Ramlee's Madu Tiga. Realised they even have a few Astro channels here. Not bad...

11.30pm. Zzzzzz.....

1am. Staff nurse Siti inserted vaginal pill to soften cervix & induce contractions. Started feeling mild contractions, ala Braxton-Hicks, about half hour later.

2.30am. ECG again. Contractions stronger now. Sometimes feel like have urge to shit or period cramps.

5.45am. ECG. Contractions more regular. Still feel the same.

6.15am. Checked for dilation. Nurse said only opened the size of her fingertip so may not be big enough for doc to break membrane. Enema. Most agonising to try and hold it in for 15 mins. Afraid bowel might not be cleared sufficiently.

7am. Nurse put in 2nd pill. Next shift of nurses came in.

8am. Breakfast brought in. ECG.

8.30am. Had shower etc. Lydia was waiting when I came out. Nice surprise! She stayed & chatted till 11. In between there was another ECG but nurse Royani said contractions now farther apart. Molly, patient educator came to educate on breastfeeding.

12pm. Dr Guna came by. Cervix still very long and narrow. Could try & rupture membrane but if dilation doesn't happen fast enough labour could be prolonged. Doc suggested waiting & ordered another ECG at 4pm. By 8am tomorrow he will break the membrane & if by noon still not dilated then a C-section it will be.

12.15pm. Lunch is served.

1.00pm. Took a nap.

1.40pm. Hubby, Mum & Uncle came. Brought Char Kuey Teow for me. Woo-hoo, my saviours!

2.30pm. Went for walk around ward. 3 baby girls in nursery. Contractions getting painful.

3pm. Dad, Aunty & Val came. Contractions of 1 min and 4 mins apart so asked to do ECG.

4.20pm. Doc checked. Still only 1cm but cervix has softened. Said may deliver middle of the night. If not, he will stick to tomorrow's plan.

4.45pm. Hubby, mum & uncle left.

5.30pm. Bloody show. Dinner was served. Showered.

6.30pm. Went for another walk.

7pm. ECG. Keon & Khai Veun turned up. Babe's heartbeat went down audibly on one occasion. Contractions reduced in intensity.

7.15pm. Hubby, Mummy, Uncle, Val & Yu Lin came. Brought me fishballs.

8.30pm. Keat came. Full house in room. Luckily still have whole room to myself. Koh & Mak Em called.

9.20pm. Eileen called. Took walk with hubby.

10pm. ECG. Doc dropped by. Contractions quite strong & regular but since I'm not in pain yet, no sign of baby coming soon. Again suggests we stick to plan. Said dip in heartbeat may be due to baby reacting to long hours of contractions.

10.30pm. Everyone left. Went to sleep.

12am. ECG. Babe's heartbeat strong again & was active. Contractions gone down again.

5.50am. ECG. Only 1 contraction the whole time.

6.10am. Nurse Lee came to chat. Said I might as well go straight for C-section. Why chance it especially when forceps & vacuum are not an option? That's the dilemma I'd been battling with & was good to hear it from someone else. It's not like we've not tried to induce her. Maybe God meant for this & it's the safest for her.

6.25am. Dilation only 2cm! And with no contractions! Really, what are my odds? Enema again. Hubby said he'll support me whatever my decision.

6.40am. Showered & washed hair. Told Nurse Lee I'd like a word with Doc.

7.45am. Discussed with Doc & mutually agreed to go straight for C-sect. He said chances high that I'll experience the same for subsequent pregnancies.

8.15am. My gang came. Fasting before op required so only had Horlicks & 2 crackers. Changed to hospital gown. Watched telly & read to while time away.

11.45am. Nurse Royani told me to be prepared.

12pm. Sze Leng was explaining the C-sect procedure over the phone when they came to wheel me in. In haste, forgot to remove contacts & ask hubby to bring specs with him.

12.30pm. Lay unattended in the recovery area for quite a while before Dr Hilmi came to prepare me. First the needle to numb the area. Then the spinal was put in. Very uncomfortable & at times painful. Think he removed & put it in more than once. Ouch! Felt bolts of current going down right then left leg. Almost instantaneously they started to feel like deadweight. Numbness spread to my chest up to fingers. Started seeing stars & breathing was laboured. Doc said my BP suddenly dropped & gave me something to rectify it. Felt as though heart was beating very fast but Doc said that heartrate was normal.

1pm. Wheeled into OT. My arms were spread apart & heartrate monitor strapped onto left finger & warm air strewn into right arm to body. Gown was lifted to cover my view. Oxygen mask put on. Felt nauseous & had spasms. Was asked to turn head to right to vomit but nothing came & it passed after a while.

1.10pm. Hubby came in dressed in scrubs. Felt most comforted by his presence.

1.15pm. Dr Guna opened me up. Could feel a lot of strong tugging. Hubby gave me running commentary on procedure. It was surreal to see me conscious & talking to him on one side & to see my guts open on the other. Said he could also see my fat. Doc kept peeping over to make sure I was OK.

1.25pm. She's out! Very strong lungs. Was wailing at the top of her voice the whole time she was there... A good 10 minutes. She looked grey & all limbs when she was brought out. Dr Musa made a brief appearance to check her. Staff showed her to me & I was allowed to kiss her. She's so sweet!

1.30pm. Doc took cord blood (402 million cells - very good count), removed placenta & stitched me up. Hubby was led out. Doc congratulated me.

1.45pm. Moved to recovery area to wait for 15 mins. Started feeling really exhausted.

2.15pm. Back in room 226. Nurse Bariyah brought her in. She smelt divine even though not cleaned yet. Took her away to be bathed then brought her back to be fed. Nurse helped to determine that I had milk (colustrum). Fed my baby for the first time. Decided then that she would be a Natalie.

4pm. Dr Guna came on his rounds. Told us that the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck almost 3 times so it was just as well we opted for caesarean. Otherwise at best would have ended in emergency op & could have encountered severe complications. Hubby realised that during the op, doc did show him the cord around her neck but didn't know what it was then.

.... can't remember what else happened 'coz got too tired to record.....